Last Updated on December 27, 2023 by Il-ham B
Hey, Gems! Welcome back. I know I have been MIA for a while. Hopefully, I haven’t left y’all hanging for too long. My absence is due to me going through the feeling of the end of a chapter in life. I have been so focused on turning the page. Which made it seem like the period at the end of this chapter of my life wasn’t coming fast enough. I have felt defeated about the whole situation. The universe had to add an extra paragraph about patience to humble me. The moral of the story is to be patient because everything comes to you in God’s timing.
As a result of how I was feeling, I decided to take a step back to be able to see the bigger picture. Likewise, it was key for me to revisit my intentions. My reflection made me come to the following awareness. I was so focused on the end goal that I neglected to enjoy the process. I can now say that the page has turned. This brings me to the topic of this blog post. Personal development, growing at your own pace, and staying in your lane.
Personal development
What is personal growth? Personal development is the purposeful, lifelong process of achieving psychological, spiritual, physical, intellectual, and social development. We do this by learning, developing, and mastering new skills to be able to meet our full potential. (check out Maslow’s Hierarchy of needs) Hence, it is what we are all seeking.
Personal growth also means desiring to level up and the willingness to make a change in one’s life. It implies, constantly pushing yourself out of your comfort zone. Accordingly, it helps us unlock all the potential fear and procrastination stops us from fulfilling.
That said, amongst all the daily challenges we go through, we also have the added pressure of social networks. These platforms are so easily accessible that everybody’s life is on the front street. It makes it easy to compare our personal growth and achievement to every single disproportionate rate of success-story-post we come across on the “innanet” I feel like we are constantly trying to discern between inspirational posts or discouraging images. That said, why is it important to grow at your own pace?
Grow at your own pace
With personal development also comes the value of letting yourself grow at your own pace. I had to learn this very early on. At a young age, my parents compared me to my peers. Mostly academically, which is fair. They had the best intentions. But, It didn’t change the fact that their constant comparisons had made me insecure at a point in time. From that experience, I’ve always understood that I learn and grow at my own pace. With that awareness, I’ve spent most of my adult years making sure I wasn’t comparing myself to other people’s perceptions, visions, or versions of success.
It has taught me an important lesson that, no matter where you are in life, you are allowed to define your growth rate. Pursue it in your own time. And choose how you wish to measure it. Don’t drain yourself or your energy by constantly trying to live someone else’s definition of what a good life should look or feel like. Focus on your success, passion, and goals. The desire to improve and the willingness to make a change are also measurable progress.
Remember that finding your purpose is a never-ending journey you need to steadily cultivate. In the process, hold on to your vision by staying focused in your lane. You are the only one that can define your progress.
It is a marathon, not a race. Strive for progress, not perfection.
The I.B Files
Stay in your lane
On the other hand, some of us struggle with constantly feeling like we are not doing enough. We feel inadequate because we are always comparing ourselves in a different way to everyone else. Subconsciously, we compare the worst of ourselves to the best of everyone else. This assessment is unproductive and can cause anxiety, low self-esteem, and a defeatist attitude. Protect your energy sis, cause what you are doing is taking the focus away from your priorities, by eyeballing a glimpse of someone else’s “best life”.
Further, don’t get sidetracked by other people’s perception of success and decide to switch lanes. The better-perceived lane might not be as fast as you may think.
I should point out that it is okay to look to your left or your right in admiration. However, don’t emulate someone else by thinking you might reach the same destination/goal sooner. Besides, you will never be able to duplicate someone else’s passion.
Instead, find your passion and develop the skills to work on it the best you can. You can do this by setting goals and ticking them off your list. Additionally, the more you set small achievable goals, the more victories to celebrate. Importantly, trust your vision and talent because you are unique. No one can do what you do.
Mind your business and stay in your lane.
The I.B Files
With all that, doing what you love and are passionate about will always give you confidence. Thus, what others are doing will not trigger you to switch lanes. What is for them is theirs. Just like what is for you is yours. Okey!
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Embrace your pace
At the end of the day, the journey is as important as the destination so embrace it. I am here to tell you; that if you are consistently giving your all and striving to better yourself then you are doing enough. You are growing sis. Keep watering that seed/plant. In the process, always acknowledge how far you’ve come, and don’t forget to pat yourself on the back. Just like plants, we all grow at our own pace.
Comment below, I am looking forward to reading your thoughts on this post. What triggers you to want to be better, and do better? Let’s learn from each other. I hope you enjoyed this post on personal development, allowing yourself to grow at your own pace, and staying in your lane.
Bisou x.
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